Marcus Olang'

Dear Facebook,

I realise you probably believe yourselves to be the absolute monarch of global interconnectivity. Which you are, going by your frequent, unilateral and confoundingly cocky decisions - from hauling me from design to ruddy design with absolutely no regard for my opinion, to quietly changing your terms of use time and time again, to quite likely auctioning my data to the highest bidder… Scratch that: Hawking it to anyone willing to give you the money… And now this dictatorial decision to “disable” my account.

I don’t see myself bowing down to your great might, M. Zuckerberg et al, but there are people who can only get in touch with me via this platform - surprise surprise - such as this intriguing conversation I had with someone on your good platform:

Inbox (1): Thx 4 th add. I’m Sexci Jen.

Reply: Thanks. I must have overlooked the part atop your profile that said ‘Sexci Jen’.

Which - let’s be honest - is conversation I’d never have had anywhere else.

I may have forgotten to mention how you’ve expanded the capabilities of your good platform, which means not only can I conduct business here, I can also run a number of brand pages. Which I do, by the way.

And, of course the tons of flirting that happens thanks to this brilliant feature you happen to have named “Inbox”. Such as with people who make me fear for the future of humanity, as exhibited by Ms. “Sexci Jen” above.

For these and more reasons (that I honestly do not have the time nor energy to get into right now), I would truly appreciate having my account back, thank you. So if you’d kindly do me that small favour, I’d be rather grateful.

Before I forget: Good luck with the public listing. “And now to make these pitiful saplings our slaves.”

Indeed.

Hugs and kisses.

[name above]

*-*-*

P.S.: This will probably be on Tumblr. Oh, look at that: http://bit.ly/xoPUwm

Of course, I post it in the idle hope that it garner some form of attention. Which might or might not happen. Meh.